Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
