Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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