Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
