Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
