I love black thongs
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
