I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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