She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
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