The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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