That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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