I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
