Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
