And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize