return my video game
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
