Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
