I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
