I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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