If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
false alarm. still invincible.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
