Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Floor bacon is actually really good
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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