Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Randomize
