i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
