HIV tests are more positive than that guy
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
