your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
id be glad to
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
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