If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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