how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
