still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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