How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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