If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
