I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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