Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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