Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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