Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I have feelings that need drinking.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
