perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Randomize
