it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
you had me at cake vodka
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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