Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
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