dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I deserve to be covered in dicks
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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