Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize