remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
even my farts smell like vagina
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
