I wish I only lived at night.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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