dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Randomize
