I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
