I must be too annoying 4 u.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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