I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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