I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
