totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I enjoy the company of your penis
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
