if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I FOUND THE LEGS
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
