i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Randomize
