And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
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