She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
