Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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