I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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